Welcome to the Conscious Communication Chronicle, sharing how Conscious Communication results in success, and how you can achieve yours.   Enjoy!

Ian Blei,
Founder of
Optimized Results
 

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2nd Edition now available

Also available at:
Browser Books
 2195 Fillmore St.
San Francisco, CA
 

Kind Ambition:
Practical Steps
to Achieve Success
 Without Losing Your Soul
 

Kind Ambition is about you having the tools to slide over to the driver’s seat of your own life.  Circumstances will always be changing, seemingly thwarting our plans, but we don’t have to be  thrown around by them. You can be in charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.

Kind Ambition is written for you, as a practical guide you can use right now.  It is a collection of  insights and actions designed to help you move forward and get more out of your life at home and at work.  The chapters hold to a formula of first giving you a new way to look at things, then offering you tangible Action Steps to try them out, and finally some things to notice when you do.

Come visit our site
and read excerpts from

 "Kind Ambition
Practical Steps to Achieve Success Without Losing Your Soul"
***FREE!***

Conscious Communication: bringing communication up from "auto-pilot" and reactive, to thoughtful, responsive, and above all, intentional.

As much time as I spend on linguistics and how they reveal our worldviews and those of people we converse with, there is also an 800 pound gorilla in the room called “tone.”

Along with body language, tone has great impact on our communication.  Even the lack of tone in e-mail causes its own misunderstandings.  Conversationally, you’ve felt how tone affects you.  Yelling hits you differently than cooing.  The sound itself carries its own energy.  Shout at your pet how much you love him/her and watch as they duck or run.  Warmly, sweetly coo how much you can’t stand them and they’ll purr or wag their tail.  We are not so far up the ladder from our pets; we share lots of biology.

Before our cerebrum gets a chance to start processing words and language, the carrier waves (sound) have already impacted our reptilian flight-or-fight brain.  If there is congruity between word and tone, we process faster.  If there is incongruity, we progress to secondary and tertiary systems, trying to ascertain which is accurate and if there is a threat.  All of that takes away from processing the initial message, which gets diluted and changed by the over-processing (much like food does).

We usually maintain congruity in tone and message when we’re being conscious about it.  When we’re not, our message can be taken rudely off course.  You’ve probably experienced somebody snapping at you about something that had nothing to do with you?  That quick processing, where you try to determine why this person is mad at you takes you away from hearing their words without that coloring.

We’re probably all guilty of giving as well as receiving that mixed message.  Ever get interrupted by someone just as you hit your thumb with a hammer (or equivalent)?  They are likely to hear about it as if it was their fault.  Then we apologize later.

That might be an extreme example, but the fact is enough of our communication gets trashed by our tone to be worthy of attention.  We can so easily solve the problem with added consciousness that it becomes almost irresponsible not to try.

Remember Before You React
This is Chapter 26 in “Kind Ambition,” (in more depth) however part of this idea is directly related to tone.  When we speak without thinking, our words and tone fly like debris from a lawn mower.  The odds of actually communicating what you meant to communicate are almost random.

Taking a second to pause, choose your words, remember the real person you are addressing, and choose your tone accordingly will greatly enhance your interactions.  This will enable you to communicate more effectively, without all the reactions that take over; and take you both off track.

If I’m doing my taxes, frustrated and maybe annoyed, and you call me on the phone, I can either mindlessly grab the phone and answer with all the annoyance and frustration in my voice, or take a second to compose myself before I open the interaction with you.  It is a conscious choice.

Smiley Faces?!
Here’s something you can do right now that always has a positive affect on both you and whoever you’re interacting with: smile.  I’m not saying “grin like a fool.”  Just smile.  Merely smiling (even on the inside) has a powerful impact on your physiological state and biochemistry.  It’s very difficult to be cranky when you’re smiling; your body won’t let you.

Likewise, when you are on the phone with someone, they can tell if you’re smiling or not.  Your tone gives you away, and the conversation can take a more positive path.

Try yelling at yourself in the mirror while you’re smiling.  You’ll crack yourself up.  Following that, notice your feeling/thinking/being state.  Your mood will be elevated, regardless of how you were feeling before.  This is just one tiny way you can consciously shift your biochemistry and subsequent mood.

The best part is it’s contagious, rather like a yawn (perhaps just one more place where Mirror Neurons in the brain have their impact).  Remembering that we can shift our mood and the mood of those around us, merely by smiling and being conscious of our tone gives us more power and control of our interactions than we might have believed.  So have some fun with this, and see how you can make things a little more positive for yourself, and those around you.

****************

“Kind Ambition” Featured in

Women's Day Magazine!!!

"If you are interested in success, whether it is in running a large organization, a small business, or leading a satisfying life, you will find a right blend of rules, wisdom and wit in a digestible fashion that will serve to accomplish your objectives. The notion that kindness can be blended with ambition and made to work and serve the "bottom line" is enlightening, uplifting and satisfying."

-Steven Kiefel – CEO, Red Pill Media

“An easy to use guide for anyone who wants to achieve real
 growth and success. His sensible and practical tactics
solve age-old challenges with real, how-to solutions. Best of all, Ian lives his work!”

-Romanus Wolter - Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
Success Coach Columnist: Entrepreneur Magazine
Radio Host: Syndicated Kick Start Guy Segment

" We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these
 come from within, subverting our conscious intentions. The
 good news is: they can be overcome.  The techniques and
 processes found in this book will help you on your way."

-Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's

 Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters

Syndicated Columnist: Fast Company Magazine

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