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September

2013

 
Drive Your Moods
Instead of Them Driving You!

Conscious Communication: bringing communication up from "auto-pilot" and reactive, to thoughtful, responsive, and above all, intentional.

Feature Article 

No time? Listen to the  podcast (7:49 min.) in the background while you file, exercise, ride to work, etc.

 

Upcoming Events

Feature Article 

Special Offer

Quick Communication Tip

Resource Links

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"Conscious Jam" Tele-Radio
Where the crazy and conscious collide

Tuesday, September 17, 2013
"Replacing Fear with Desire"

7:00-8:00 pm PST

Register Here

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Drive Your Moods
Instead of Them Driving You

(click for podcast)


In preparing for a recent talk on pain management using natural brain chemistry, I found that the mass of chemicals and electrical impulses we call a brain is a limitless source of discovery.  Some say we use less than 10% of our brain.  I certainly know people who exemplify this, but when we say “use,” I think we need to be more specific.

Our brains are working all the time.  We may not be aware of most of what’s happening, but with or without our permission, our brains are constantly processing.  Electrical impulses and hormonal triggers dance in a vast chemical soup, and we experience things like joy, sadness, ecstasy, anger, and depression.  Although we may have always thought we were just passengers on that emotional roller coaster, the truth is, you have far more power over your experience than you may have thought.

The useful thing to keep in mind here is that these are systems, and in virtually any system, flow goes both ways.  For example, in cognitive linguistics, we know that our thinking shifts our language choices, and our language choices shift our thinking.  This means we have a mechanism, and we can affect change.  Just as what’s going on in our lives can affect our insides, our insides can affect what’s going on in our lives.  To be precise, it affects how we feel about and deal with what’s going on in our lives


States, Stages, and Solutions
What we’re focusing on here are two aspects of the individual: the psyche and the physiology.  Looking at them from a compartmentalized perspective is helpful in understanding each part’s role, but the live interplay between them (mind and body) is a fertile area for you to make an impact.

Our physiology developed and evolved simultaneously with our psyches; each impacting the other along the way.  Understanding how they play together shows us how we can get intentionally involved, and drive things the direction we want to go.

Let’s look at a part of the Serotonin mechanism, as an example of how this works.  From an evolutionary standpoint, being “important” to the tribe was important to survival.  We developed a biochemical reward mechanism in our brains to support this.  When you provided something of value to your tribe, they gave you validation, and your brain got a nice Serotonin boost.  Being able to provide for yourself and others was a very positive thing in the Neolithic world, and thanks to our brain chemistry, it felt great too.

The potential double-edged sword here is that if you aren’t getting that external validation, there’s a chance you won’t feel important, and your Serotonin level will drop, facilitating depression.  This is the nature of transient solutions; you can’t count on them.  I’ve often likened this to mooring your boat to a piece of kelp; not a particularly stable or fixed anchor.

Being in command of increasing your Serotonin is better served when your sense of importance is associated with what won’t disappear or get taken away from you.  This is where what’s usually called a sense of spirituality enters the scientific picture.

We have an intuitive knowledge that we’re a part of something larger than ourselves.  In String Theory, the Universe is described as a vast fabric of energetic threads that connect everything.  Knowing that we’re connected like this is a gateway to upward development for our psyches.  The more we “move up” the developmental scale, the less we’re focused on ourselves in survival mode.  In fact, moving up or down on this three-dimensional model is pretty much a function of how much survival/stress we’re experiencing.

As we deal with stressful situations, we get narrow-sighted; both physically and mentally, in response to our survival-threat brain chemistry, also known as flight or fight.  This narrowness limits us to a lower level of consciousness, primarily focused on I, me, and mine.  So when we’re looking for ways to increase our Serotonin levels while in survival mode, we look for solutions down there.  The problem is that most of those solutions tend to be transient ones.

This is when that sense of connection becomes an exceptionally practical perspective.  What the Sufis call a “Remembrance of the Oneness” offers us that sense of importance in a way that doesn’t require validation from other people.  When we feel value and importance as part of a greater whole, we get our Serotonin boost.  The Serotonin boost regulates our sense of calm, and our internal body clock.  Merely getting in touch with this sense of connectedness actually improves everything from your mood to sleep to blood platelet production.

We have mechanisms for boosting other positive brain chemicals and lowering flight or fight brain chemicals as well, and I’ll take them on in future installments.  For now, just knowing that you have the ability to be in command, rather than at the mercy, of your own emotional state is a great start.  This is where your sense of importance and self reliance begins, and that puts you on your path.


     - Ian J. Blei


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Special Offer - End of Summer/New Semester

As this proved helpful for people last month, I'm going to run another
Special Offer

I'm going to give away 3 complimentary coaching sessions to the first 3 people to email me with this month's "secret word."  Ready?

The secret word for September is "Playground." Just put that in your email, along with your contact info so we can schedule.

Each session is a normally a $187.00 value, and will be worth much more to you in life-changing ways.  Good luck!

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Quick Communication Tip

Internal Dialogue

We have an internal dialogue going on all the time.  Our internal communication can be encouraging and propelling, or stifling and limiting.  Taking command of that conversation is your first step in shifting this dynamic from being the passenger to being the driver of your own life.

Pay close attention to what you’re saying to yourself.  Use the R.A.R.E. process to catch yourself when you’re painting yourself into a corner, and replace those words with words of encouragement and solutions.  Here’s one tiny example:  Simply shifting “can I do this?” with “how will I do this?” takes you from powerless to empowered.  When you’re asking yourself if you can do it, your abilities are the problem to be solved.  When you’re asking yourself how you will do it, your abilities are no longer in question, and you focus on solving the actual problem before you.


Want to learn more about how your communication can hold you back or catapult you forward?  Come visit the web site, or better yet, contact me and see how we can design a program to fit your needs and desired outcomes.


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Resource Links:


Conscious Communication - the podcast series

Melissa Risdon's Raving Fan Radio Show:
Ian Blei on the
Integram (TM) -understanding ourselves, each other, and our relationships

KG Stiles: "Conversations that Enlighten and Heal"
Ian Blei on Kind Ambition and the
Integram (TM)

Kind Ambition - 2nd Edition

Got Blog? c
ome visit the Blog.

Character Driven - Ever want to create characters that were so believable, that people forgot they were characters?
 


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Welcome to the Conscious Communication Chronicle, sharing how Conscious Communication results in success, and how you can achieve yours.   Enjoy!

 

 



The Optimizer
Ian Blei,
Director of the
Institute for Integral Enneagram Studies and
President of
Optimized Results
415.826.0478

 

 

Kind Ambition

Click HERE

 

 

 

 


Kind Ambition:
Practical Steps
to Achieve Success
 Without Losing Your Soul
 

 

 

Kind Ambition
Fan Page
now on
 FACEBOOK

 

 

Kind Ambition is about you having the tools to slide over to the driver’s seat of your own life.  Circumstances will always be changing, seemingly thwarting our plans, but we don’t have to be  thrown around by them. You can be in charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.

 

Kind Ambition is written for you, as a practical guide you can use right now.  It is a collection of  insights and actions designed to help you move forward and get more out of your life at home and at work.  The chapters hold to a formula of first giving you a new way to look at things, then offering you tangible Action Steps to try them out, and finally some things to notice when you do.

 

 

 

 

Kind words for “Kind Ambition”

 

"If you are interested in success, whether it is in running a large organization, a small business, or leading a satisfying life, you will find a right blend of rules, wisdom and wit in a digestible fashion that will serve to accomplish your objectives. The notion that kindness can be blended with ambition and made to work and serve the "bottom line" is enlightening, uplifting and satisfying."

-Steven Kiefel – CEO, Red Pill Media

 

 

 

“An easy to use guide for anyone who wants to achieve real  growth and success. His sensible and practical tactics solve age-old challenges with real, how-to solutions. Best of all, Ian lives his work!”

-Romanus Wolter - Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
Success Coach Columnist: Entrepreneur Magazine
Radio Host: Syndicated Kick Start Guy Segment

 

 

 

" We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these come from within, subverting our conscious intentions. The  good news is: they can be overcome.  The techniques and processes found in this book will help you on your way."

-Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's

 Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters

Syndicated Columnist: Fast Company Magazine

 

 

 

“A scientifically-based, spiritually-awake, (and smart and funny) guide to making the most of your life.  Ian Blei provides the know-how, the inspiration, the structure and all the tools you need in  this straightforward and inspirational book.”

     -Lisa Betts-LaCroix, Past President of SF Coaches
Star of Unapix film, “Dance Me Outside”

 

 

 

" Ian Blei shares his deep insights in simple and straightforward ways.  His work continues to inspire me whenever I feel I'm getting stuck in some area of my life."

-Roy King, III , Director Pacific Development Partners

 

 

 

   

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