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September 2007


Internal Prejudice 

Welcome to the Conscious Communication Chronicle, sharing how Conscious Communication results in success, and how you can achieve yours.   Enjoy!

 




Ian Blei,
Director of the
Integral Enneagram Institute and
President of
Optimized Results
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Available at:
 

Browser Books
 2195 Fillmore St.
San Francisco, CA
 

Cover to Cover
 1307 Castro St.
San Francisco, CA
 

Phoenix Books
 3850 24th St.
San Francisco, CA
 

and of course the 800 lb.
Amazon.com
 

Kind Ambition:
Practical Steps
to Achieve Success
 Without Losing Your Soul
 

Kind Ambition is about you having the tools to slide over to the driver’s seat of your own life.  Circumstances will always be changing, seemingly thwarting our plans, but we don’t have to be  thrown around by them. You can be in charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.

Kind Ambition is written for you, as a practical guide you can use right now.  It is a collection of  insights and actions designed to help you move forward and get more out of your life at home and at work.  The chapters hold to a formula of first giving you a new way to look at things, then offering you tangible Action Steps to try them out, and finally some things to notice when you do.

 

Kind words for “Kind Ambition”

"If you are interested in success, whether it is in running a large organization, a small business, or leading a satisfying life, you will find a right blend of rules, wisdom and wit in a digestible fashion that will serve to accomplish your objectives. The notion that kindness can be blended with ambition and made to work and serve the "bottom line" is enlightening, uplifting and satisfying."

-Steven Kiefel – CEO, Red Pill Media

 

“An easy to use guide for anyone who wants to achieve real
 growth and success. His sensible and practical tactics
solve age-old challenges with real, how-to solutions. Best of all, Ian lives his work!”

-Romanus Wolter - Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
Success Coach Columnist: Entrepreneur Magazine
Radio Host: Syndicated Kick Start Guy Segment

 

" We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these come from within, subverting our conscious intentions. The  good news is: they can be overcome.  The techniques and processes found in this book will help you on your way."

-Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's

 Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters

Syndicated Columnist: Fast Company Magazine

 

“A scientifically-based, spiritually-awake, (and smart and funny) guide to making the most of your life.  Ian Blei provides the know-how, the inspiration, the structure and all the tools you need in  this straightforward and inspirational book.”

                       -Lisa Betts-LaCroix, Past President of SF Coaches
Star of Unapix film, “Dance Me Outside”

 

" Ian Blei shares his deep insights in simple and straightforward ways.  His work continues to inspire me whenever I feel I'm getting stuck in some area of my life."

-Roy King, III, Director Pacific Development Partners

Conscious Communication: bringing communication up from "auto-pilot" and reactive, to thoughtful, responsive, and above all, intentional.

 

Feature Article - Internal Prejudice - podcast version

Quick Communication Tip

Exciting News

Upcoming Events

Resource Links

 

 

Tuesday, Oct. 9th, 2007

"Intro to the Integral Enneagram - a New Approach"

From Compulsion to Choice;

            - getting off the 'hamster wheel.'

7:00pm-8:30pm

Fort Mason Center, Building C, Room 220
Marina Blvd. at Buchanan St., San Francisco

More Info

 

               *************

 

Thursday, Oct. 18th, 2007

"Intro to the Integral Enneagram - a New Approach"

From Compulsion to Choice;

            - getting off the 'hamster wheel.'

(Encore Performance)

7:00pm-8:30pm
Fort Mason Center, Building C, Room 190
Marina Blvd. at Buchanan St., San Francisco
More Info

 

               *************

 

Tuesday, Oct. 23rd, 2007

"Optimize Your Communication for Success"

7:00pm-8:30pm
Fort Mason Center, Building C, Room 190
Marina Blvd. at Buchanan St., San Francisco
More Info

 

 

               *************

 

Conscious Communication - the Podcast

This month the Conscious Communication Chronicle will be become available in Podcast form for your convenience and time management needs.  (Announcement forthcoming).

 

 

 

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Exciting News!

As many of you know, I’ve been working on a model of human consciousness that synthesizes the Enneagram, Integral Studies, Cognitive Linguistics, Spiral Dynamics, and several other models and disciplines, for the purpose of developing practical paths to higher consciousness.

 

After decades of work, and hundreds of client sessions, seminars, and workshops, I’m excited to announce the birth of the Integral Enneagram Institute.  The Integral Enneagram is not the “Enneagram of Personality,” currently enjoying prominence in coaching and psychology, but a new model integrated with the principles of AQAL and Ken Wilber’s Integral Consciousness Studies.  The scale of altitude in this model is based upon consciousness evolution, rather than psychodynamic health. (Riso, Hudson, Palmer, et al, work with the Enneagram of Personality).

 

As widespread greed, aggression, and violence are primarily manifestations of under-developed consciousness, rather than psychological dysfunction, it becomes obvious that pervasive and permanent growth in consciousness development would eliminate these issues on a global level.  This is the greater aim of the Integral Enneagram Institute.

 

 

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Internal Prejudice  

 

"Hierarchies"

Last month we addressed some less-than-conscious areas of our communication; both internal and external.  Starting with the internal, we looked at how we insult or berate ourselves when we make mistakes or forget something.  This is only part of a much larger issue going on, and once again, we can make an enormous difference by how we talk to ourselves.  Take motivation.  It’s more common for us to kick ourselves in the butt rather than ask ourselves for something nicely.  There are hundreds of rationalizations for this and rather than chasing dandelions, let’s look at the root of this internal discord.

 

Almost every one of us is taught from early childhood that our primary way of taking in and processing the world around us is either wrong or somehow inferior to someone else’s way.  Although we're born with this primary processing center (in its own way quite perfect) external indoctrination sets up a hierarchy, and in the majority of cases puts your natural way down a notch or two.  This is internal prejudice.

 

A very common example of this would be the “clear, detached thinking over emotional feelings” hierarchy.  Someone who is quite feelings-centric can easily be convinced that their “pain” is a result of their chaotic feelings, and that they “should” control these feelings with detached thinking – to ease their pain.  Two problems arise with this: a self-denigrating program is put in place, and it doesn’t work.

 

Either in rebellion or from a stronger sense of self, a faction of feelings-centric processing types will assert feelings over thinking in a different hierarchy.  Their rationale will usually invoke authenticity, presence, and a sense of unique identity. 

 

This is the familiar “flaky-artist versus android” hierarchy argument, and we haven’t even introduced the intuitive, gut-driven, “I just know it” group.  Three variables (heart, brain, gut) increase our possible combinations to nine hierarchies.  There’s clear thinking over feelings, and then intuition, intuition over feelings, and then thinking, etc.  These hierarchies that we’ve put in place are nothing more than belief systems about our own ways of processing.

 

 

Limitations or Resources

How we regard aspects of ourselves in hierarchy; judging, rating, and so on, is an extremely limiting belief system.  It fragments us, rather than working toward integration, and it sets up needless inner conflict, where cooperation would serve us better.

 

We all have at least two of these processing centers naturally (usually all three) and they each take in different information.  The free flow of that information without judgment from one part of you over another part offers you a fuller, richer experience.  Your decisions can be better (more informed) and you can take action more easily, without the internal filibustering and power struggles.

 

The difference between these extremes of limitations or resources is entirely dependent on your belief.  You are ultimately in charge of this.  If you believe cool, detached thinking is a superior form of processing, or the opposite, you will set up internal conflict and filter the information coming in.  If you acknowledge each of your processing centers as taking in its own forms of information, all equally valid, you eliminate the internal conflict, and take in much more information.  You fully use your own resources.

 

 

Equal But Not Separate

Eliminating a belief system about that internal hierarchy does not alter the fact that each of us still has primary processing centers.  When you throw a ball into a room, it hits one surface first, before bouncing to others. This isn’t superiority, it’s merely sequence, and our primary processing center is that first surface encountering life.

 

It is very difficult to consciously process emotional input, thinking, and sensory impressions simultaneously.  Thankfully we have kind of a biological buffer that stores what we’re taking in while we process it over time.  (This is why we often realize a day later why we felt something the day before.)

 

Our primary processing center just encounters life first.  If we are taught that it isn’t valid, we spend our lives invalidating ourselves.  If we raise it above the others, we filter and miss information.

 

By shifting our beliefs about the false hierarchies and prejudices we create with our very abilities to take in and process, we can facilitate a smooth integration of our best aspects.  We can eliminate the internal conflicts and reproaches that stutter and hiccup when we want to take action.  And because these beliefs are about false hierarchies, they are not so difficult to shift, with just a little extra.. say it with me: “consciousness.” 

 

 

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Quick Communication Tip

 

Pronouns!

At the core of both great humor and ferocious arguments, pronouns are convenient, quick, and utterly ambiguous when their antecedent has gotten lost in the conversation.

 

We know that defining terms is imperative to clear communication, and yet we get a little sloppy with our pronouns.  "He said it wouldn't work if they didn't do it on time."  Huh??  Unfortunately, if the listener doesn't actively go after those antecedents, the assumption game jumps up to bite us on "it."

 

When you are trying to communicate something clearly, and  without misunderstandings, avoid using pronouns, period.  This is a "measure twice, cut once" time saver, and you'll see dividends immediately.

 

 

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Recently, I received some wonderful feedback on a Podcast recorded for the Coaching the Life Coach series on Personal Life Media.  And this is from a Marketing and Communications Professional:

 

"I thought it was sooooooo worth listening to, learned a lot of tips I plan to use right away, found it something that was not superficial (which I can't stand) and really made me think - deeply.  GREAT JOB!  Will save this and listen often." - Alison Bliss, Film Commission, City of Alameda

 

So in hopes that you'd like some fun education while you're working out, biking, driving, or at your computer, here's that Podcast:

Communication Excellence Podcast "Coaching the Life Coach" department for Personal Life Media (direct download)

 

Want more?  Here you go:

"Why Communication Goes Awry" - Interview for Entrepreneur Magazine Radio w/ Romanus Wolter

Interview Podcast for Evolutionary Radio w/ Jason McClain

Kind Ambition - 2nd Edition now available

Got Blog? come visit the Blog.  Rants and delvings for your entertainment.

Character Driven - Ever want to create characters that were so believable, that people forgot they were characters?
 

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