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June 2006 |
Turning Cranial Chaos Into a Choir |
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Welcome to the Conscious Communication Chronicle, sharing how Conscious Communication results in success, and how you can achieve yours. Enjoy!
Upcoming Events:
"Optimize
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"Leverage
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11:30 p.m. - 2:00 p.m.
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Now we can continue the
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Kind Ambition:
Kind Ambition
is
about you having
the tools to slide over to the
driver’s seat of your
own life.
Circumstances will always be
changing, seemingly thwarting
our plans, but we don’t have to be
thrown around by them. You can
be in
charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.
Kind Ambition
is written for you,
as a practical guide you can
use
right now. It is a
collection of
insights and actions designed to
help
you move forward and get
more out
of your life at home and
at work.
The chapters hold to a
formula of
first giving you a new
way to look at
things, then offering
you tangible
Action Steps to try
them out, and
finally some things to notice when you do.
Come
visit our site
"Kind Ambition
"
Ian Blei shares his deep insights in simple and straightforward
ways. His work continues to inspire me whenever I feel I'm getting stuck in some area of my life."
-Roy King, III, Director Pacific Development Partners |
Conscious Communication: bringing communication up from "auto-pilot" and reactive, to thoughtful, responsive, and above all, intentional.
Those conversations you have with yourself when making a decision are between more voices than you might imagine. We generally accept that there are two voices (a dialectic) offering two sides of a situation. If only it were that simple, we’d be able to make decisions instantly, with no questions or remorse (like a computer – digital; two voices: 0 and 1).
Do you remember the old cartoons with Goofy on each of Mickey Mouse’s shoulders; one representing a devil, and the other an angel? This represented the simplistic Good vs. Evil influences in our decision-making. Once again, if only it were a simple binary input, those discussions in our heads would be so much shorter. What’s more, once we decided, we wouldn’t question or ruminate afterward.
You are far more complex, and there are more than two voices in the discussion; creating depth and dimensionality. We actually have at least five voices representing five perspectives, each with its own agenda and worldview. And each of us is a composite of those perspectives.
We get a bit caught up just trying to keep track, and that chaos is where the stress comes in. When you identify those five voices and their agendas, it puts you back in control of your decision-making process.
The Multiple Perspective Perspective
An easy way of looking at the system is to imagine nine people sitting around a fire on the beach at sunset (we’ll use the west coast for this example). Depending upon your position, you might see the sun going down over the ocean, or you might see a darkening sky behind the fire. Both are true. Both taken as mutually exclusive would cause an argument. The Enneagram is a system that allows us to model these differences in perspective, holding their validity simultaneously, and understand where they’re coming from.
You know that your perspective shifts radically under stress or in great
confidence and ease, and once again the Enneagram illustrates these
dynamics as well. These are often called your Integration or
Disintegration Points. This would be akin to moving to a very different
part of that circle on the beach.
Just the Five of You.
Adjacent wings commonly have very different character traits, and this accounts for some of the sense of opposition we think is the dialectic. They’re not exact opposites, and this is where the depth and dimensionality come in, along with the confusion. The complexity of an individual is in the combination of their components.
Someone who is competitive, driven, and hard working recognizes four other voices: “I don’t want to do this, Let’s all do it together, I just want to help people, and where’s that juicy connection?”
Someone who brainstorms, plans, and thinks a million miles an hour in a thousand directions recognizes their four other voices: “Don’t go there, I’ll do it my way, why can’t anyone do it right, I love finding things out.”
You may recognize a few of those voices as your own. There are a lot of overlaps. Knowing who is saying what, and what that part’s agenda is helps you to make decisions on a far richer level. Imagine knowing that the voice saying not to go for that dream job is only your Stress Point’s opinion, and that your true self is ready and yearning for it. Knowing about this chorus also helps us to hear these voices in each other, and understand without the judgment that separates us.
Pulling Together.
Appreciating the nuances of these types and the amazing applications that are yours for the taking was the basis for Optimized Results creating nine different coaching and communication programs. Each type or worldview needs their own approach to achieving their own best results, and by listening carefully to people, you can hear between the lines, and get an idea of what makes them tick. This gives you a competitive edge on developing rapport and relationship, which is of course what drives your business.
My next seminars in July will focus on both facets of communication: interpersonal and internal, with assessments, examples, and applications. If you want that competitive edge, come join us.
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SPECIAL for Father'S DAY: In celebration of fathers everywhere, and to encourage the experience of deeper, richer, more conscious relationships, all sessions with dads are 20% off throughout the month of June.
Couples Sessions with Dad and partner, Dad and child, Dad and anyone, 20% off. Individual Sessions for all dads are 20% off too!
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Kind Words for “Kind Ambition:”
“...easy to use guide for anyone who wants to
achieve real
-Romanus Wolter -
Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
"
We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these -Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters Syndicated Columnist: Fast Company Magazine
“A scientifically-based, spiritually-awake, (and smart and funny) guide to making the most of your life. Ian Blei provides the know-how, the inspiration, the structure and all the tools you need in this straightforward and inspirational book.” -Lisa Betts-LaCroix, Past President of SF Coaches Star of Unapix film, “Dance Me Outside” |
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