an Integral Enneagram of Consciousness; a model of consciousness, including
all aspects, for designing practical
paths of personal development and evolution.
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Eggshell or Be the Ball
We see and hear it
all around us, and feel it ourselves; so much anxiety, so much stress.
Where is it coming from? We can point to so many different things, but
in reality it’s far more ubiquitous and omnipresent. The more clients I
work with and conversations with friends I have, a singular root cause
It starts with an absurdly unbalanced cultural focus, focus, focus on
the surface, and how things look; the appearance. As we move away from
reading and look at pictures, as we move away from dialog and move
toward special effects, there’s less and less emphasis on substance, and
more and more pressure around appearances.
Values; the deepest part of
who we are, don’t show on the surface, so they fall further and further
down the priority list. Where once upon a time we were drawn to and
identified ourselves with kindness, compassion, intelligence and humor,
now it’s all about the fleeting, transience of what shows in a photo.
We take our cues from TV, movies, and the web, and this translates
quickly to pressure for you to act like you’re supposed to act, to fill
a role. Rather than listening to your heart or your gut for who you
really are, you’re told to act like someone else, who’s supposedly
acting the part you’re supposed to act. You see how far from a sense of
authentic self this takes us?
And there it is: the inevitable emptiness within. The more we move all
of our energy to the outer shell, the less there’s any substance within.
We become like painted eggshells; pretty on the outside and empty
inside. The more we become eggshells, the more fragile we become, and so
easily broken. This is the anxiety, frustration, and disappointment that
we go through.
The more substance we fill ourselves with, the more solid we become, the
more unbreakable and resilient we become. When we’re solid, we can take
the bumps, dents, and bangs that life throws our way and not shatter. So
the secret is actually quite simple: we need to re-focus on our Inside,
and not let the commercial drive to buy our way out of feeling hollow
brainwash us. Keep in mind that old definition of crazy: “doing the same
thing over and over, expecting different
results.” Obviously, it’s time to do something very different.
Have you ever noticed
that when you’re in a dark room, what’s going on outside the window
grabs your attention? How about the converse? When you’re in a well
lighted room you don’t see what’s going on outside as well, and it
doesn’t distract you. This isn’t rocket science by any means. The less
you’ve got going on inside, the more distracted you are by shiny
objects. The more you’ve got going on inside, the less distracted you
are by shiny objects. Obviously, commercial entities prefer you being
empty and anxious, so you’ll be distracted by, and purchase their shiny
objects, especially when they promise you happiness.
Again, how many times do we need to experience this not working before
we see it as a failing strategy? How about when we look at each other?
Do we see each other as shiny objects? Does this create the same dynamic
where we want to “possess” the shiny object that promises happiness? Can
we really “swipe” a human, and put them in our shopping cart? When
building relationships becomes shopping for shiny objects, we experience
the same failure again, and blame ourselves for our disappointment,
anxiety, and frustration. It’s our fault because we “bought” the wrong
“shiny object,” and now must go shopping again. Maybe we need to make
that definition of crazy a mantra.
Our internal Self can only be distracted away by the external, if it’s
not built up, and not sufficiently filled out. There’s our simple
recipe: we need to focus on our internal environment, and fill it out.
When we focus on our deeply held Values; what we truly care about, and
work to bring our feelings, thoughts, words, and actions into
congruence, we begin to glow from within. The more inside glow, the less
external shiny objects are even noticeable, much less distracting. All
the brittle, fragile, anxiety begins to melt away, as we become filled
The Ever-Present What's In It For You?
Imagine how you’d
feel, if wondering what other people think about you occupied almost
none of your time or brain space. Imagine how you’d feel, if your
strength and confidence came from a place so deep within you, that they
never even occurred to you; you just embodied them and went about your
life. Imagine being so emotionally resilient that what once knocked you
for a loop and took over your whole day now was just a bump in the road.
Imagine how much time you could have back, if none of it was wasted on
chasing what you can never catch, because it resides deep within you.
You can feel better, be stronger, more resilient; where things don’t
mess with you as much. You can literally extend your lifespan, as your
telomeres aren’t getting shortened by the anxiety and stress of an
invisible “rat-race,” that you never signed up for in the first place.
Discover the joy of turning the physical pages of a book, where you’re
not rushing to sandwich the time in between the imagined rush of
multi-tasking a hundred inessential things that our culture is barraging
you to do and be. Rebel against “the machine,” and think about the
things that really matter to you. Give yourself the time to re-connect
with who you really are, under the latest fads, trends, and styles.
You’re allowed to be your authentic self. Beyond feeling better, you’ll
find that you’re more creative and interesting to yourself and others;
certainly more interesting than an eggshell painted with whatever the
media is shouting at you to be for the moment.
Want to learn more about how to become the best you possible?
Want to grab your life with both hands and
make it intentional and extraordinary? Come visit the
or better yet,
contact me and see how we can design a program to fit your needs and desired outcomes.
- Ian J. Blei
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story short I was promoted twice quite quickly after working with Ian
and have the tools needed to grow and manage my ever expanding team. I
highly recommend Ian to anyone looking for personal and professional
D.D.., Regional Sales Director, West-USAe.
The Integram (TM)
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Welcome to the Integram, where consciousness meets
Institute for Integral Enneagram
Without Losing Your Soul
about you having
the tools to slide over to the
driver’s seat of your
Circumstances will always be
changing, seemingly thwarting
our plans, but we don’t have to be
thrown around by them. You can
charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.
is written for you,
as a practical guide you can
right now. It is a collection of
insights and actions designed to help
you move forward and get more out
of your life at home and at work.
The chapters hold to a formula of
first giving you a new way to look at
things, then offering you tangible
Action Steps to try them out, and
finally some things to notice when you do.
Kind words for
"If you are interested in success, whether it is in running a large
organization, a small business, or leading a satisfying life, you will
find a right blend of rules, wisdom and wit in a digestible fashion that
will serve to accomplish your objectives. The notion that kindness can
be blended with ambition and made to work and serve the "bottom line" is
enlightening, uplifting and satisfying."
-Steven Kiefel – CEO, Red Pill Media
“An easy to use guide for anyone who wants to
growth and success. His sensible and practical tactics
solve age-old challenges with real, how-to solutions. Best of all, Ian
lives his work!”
-Romanus Wolter -
Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
Success Coach Columnist: Entrepreneur Magazine
Radio Host: Syndicated Kick Start Guy Segment
We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these come from within, subverting our conscious intentions. The
good news is: they can be overcome. The techniques and processes found in this book will help you on your way."
-Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's
Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters
Syndicated Columnist: Fast
scientifically-based, spiritually-awake, (and smart and funny) guide to
making the most of your life. Ian Blei provides the know-how, the
inspiration, the structure and all the tools you need in this
-Lisa Betts-LaCroix, Past
President of SF Coaches
Star of Unapix film,
“Dance Me Outside”
Ian Blei shares his deep insights in simple and straightforward
ways. His work continues to inspire me whenever I feel I'm getting stuck in some area of my life."
-Roy King, III
Partner/Channel Marketing Manager - Skype