About Us





Freeing Yourself of Self-Limiting Language

The Integram: an Integral Enneagram of Consciousness;  a model of consciousness, including all aspects, for designing practical paths of personal development and evolution.

Quick Links: so you can jump to any section

Feature Article 
No time? Listen to the podcast
(8:14 min.) in the background while you file, exercise, ride to work, etc.
Upcoming Events
Feature Article 
Special Offers
Resource Links


Alternative Website
Redesigning Optimized Results web site in responsive code for phones and tablets. It's going to take a while. It's hard to say good-bye to the 280 page HTML site designed for computer screens, but life is change.


Freeing Yourself of Self-Limiting Language
(click for podcast)

Either/Or - Limiting Choices
I received an email recently, sparking a chain reaction of questions for me, eventually leading to our topic. Addressing the Conscious Communication-centric “mission statement,” the observation was made that [rather than communication] there was a strong focus on psychology.  The wording of the observation establishes a kind of context or rules of the game by putting communication on one side and psychology on another. What’s interesting is that knowing what a creative person this was coming from, it probably wasn’t intended as an either/or form at all. The wording of the observation more reflected our common cultural slant for simplifying our choices; often to an either/or perspective.  If I may quote myself, this is directly in line with simplification by reduction, rather than getting to the core essence.

The thing about simplifying our choices this way is that it also limits our choices, and that’s rarely what we want.  Limiting other people’s choices may be helpful on the retail end, (ever wait tables?) but you probably want to have your options as open as possible. This is one of those unconscious ways we block ourselves, so the slightest awareness around this habit can make a big difference in your sense of emotional and mental “elbow room.”

The old maxim regarding using “yes, and” rather than “yes, but” actually speaks to the heart of this widening of our choices. We go from the digital, two possible answers of on or off to a more natural, organic spectrum. How many times have you been frustrated by multiple choice tests that wouldn’t allow you to choose more than one answer, or people who insist on yes or no answers to questions that have much more depth and texture to them? Is this about communication or is this about our psychology? Can either really exist without the other?

Mortar Between the Stones
Another place I often hear a digital choice being offered, is when people ask if I am a business coach or a life coach. I usually annoy them by answering “yes.” In fact, the reason that I so focus on communication, is because it is the very mortar between the stones of everything connecting our lives to each other, the world, and even our own thoughts and feelings. How often when you think about something, do you do it without any internal dialogue? How can we share what’s inside (psychology) with who’s outside, without communication? Whether that communication is using words to convey an internal experience to someone, to give direction, or even to mull something over in your head, those words control the nature of the outcome.

Our words and our psychology are very much like the chicken and the egg. It is almost impossible to establish a singular origin; they each create each other. Your self-talk is both the result of your psychology, and a creating element. The more we try to understand how everything fits together, the more we look at systems and relationships, the more communication becomes a factor.

The Doorway
Just as our way of seeing the world, sorting things out, and processing, creates a kind of language specific to that perspective, listening to that language from others gives you clues to their perspective. This is another example of the inextricable flow between psychology and communication.  How do you work with a given person? How do you convey things to them? Just using our own styles and hoping others will get it isn’t terribly effective, so this “conscious communication” thing becomes very useful.

Let’s take a common element that shows up in our behavior, as well as our language: self-esteem. People constantly tell you how they feel about themselves (and thus you and others) through their language. Digging into our self-talk, there are numerous “reasons” our ego gives us for why we can’t, don’t, aren’t ___________[fill in the blank].

If we follow the ripples of these “reasons,” they take us to different behaviors or ways of being in the world.  “I’m not enough” is actually quite different than “I’m not good enough,” which is again quite different than “there’s something wrong with me.” Each will manifest in the world as a completely different kind of person, with different perspectives, and speaking these slightly different versions of the same language. We need to understand this to motivate them, to sell to them, to convey our own thoughts or feelings to them, and to understand them as well. We can also use language and our communication to shift our own way of being in the world; to motivate and understand ourselves. Psychologist Martin Seligman’s work with “Learned Optimism” at Penn State relies heavily on our internal communication. Our psychology (our mind and behavior) is fluid and changeable. Just as our perspectives affect our language, our language can have a remarkable impact on our outlook (that chicken or the egg thing.)

“Everybody always does this to me” becomes a recipe for depression, whereas addressing the pervasiveness, [everybody] the permanence, [always] and the personalization, [to me] could completely reverse the affect a circumstance would have on you. Communication gives us a way in to our own insides, and a way in to others. As long as we’re going there, it couldn’t hurt to do it consciously. Doing so gives us far more options and choices, as well as much better results. You might even say it gives us optimized results.

Want to learn more about how to become the best you possible?  Want to grab your life with both hands and make it intentional and extraordinary? Come visit this web site, or better yet, contact me and see how we can design a program to fit your needs and desired outcomes.

- Ian J. Blei


June Special Offers:

June is known for graduations, weddings, and Father's Day, not to mention the beginning of summer! What's common to all? Relationships and communication.

For some it's about the communication, for others it's about optimizing your life, and I'm going to offer specials in both areas this month.

Discover your Operating System, resources, challenges, and communication styles, so you can be every bit as incredible as you were meant to be.

Click to Schedule or give me a call!
“Ian Blei is exceptionally talented at helping people get the utmost out of life. He has an incredible ability to quickly discover key patterns and issues that can either drive or inhibit breakthroughs. Ian is the ultimate bundle of experience, skill, smarts, passion and professionalism.” -M.M., Relationship Design / Business Development, Artist, Advocate, Connector


Resource Links:

The Integram (TM) the podcast series

AMP: Authentic Man Podcast:
a lively conversation between Ian Blei and Executive Director Casey Capshaw, covering everything from intimacy to video games.

Melissa Risdon's Raving Fan Radio Show:
Ian Blei on the Integram (TM) -
understanding ourselves, each other, and our relationships

KG Stiles: "Conversations that Enlighten and Heal"
Ian Blei on Kind Ambition and the Integram (TM)

Kind Ambition -
2nd Edition

Got Blog?
ome visit the Blog.




Subscribe to the Integram



Welcome to the Integram, where consciousness meets intentional design.   Enjoy!



The Optimizer
Ian Blei,
Director of the
Institute for Integral Enneagram Studies and
President of
Optimized Results



Kind Ambition

Click HERE





Kind Ambition:
Practical Steps
to Achieve Success
 Without Losing Your Soul



Kind Ambition
Fan Page
now on



Kind Ambition is about you having the tools to slide over to the driver’s seat of your own life.  Circumstances will always be changing, seemingly thwarting our plans, but we don’t have to be  thrown around by them. You can be in charge of your choices and actions more than you might imagine - yet.


Kind Ambition is written for you, as a practical guide you can use right now.  It is a collection of  insights and actions designed to help you move forward and get more out of your life at home and at work.  The chapters hold to a formula of first giving you a new way to look at things, then offering you tangible Action Steps to try them out, and finally some things to notice when you do.





Kind words for “Kind Ambition”


"If you are interested in success, whether it is in running a large organization, a small business, or leading a satisfying life, you will find a right blend of rules, wisdom and wit in a digestible fashion that will serve to accomplish your objectives. The notion that kindness can be blended with ambition and made to work and serve the "bottom line" is enlightening, uplifting and satisfying."

-Steven Kiefel – CEO, Red Pill Media




“An easy to use guide for anyone who wants to achieve real  growth and success. His sensible and practical tactics solve age-old challenges with real, how-to solutions. Best of all, Ian lives his work!”

-Romanus Wolter - Author: Kick Start Your Dream Business
Success Coach Columnist: Entrepreneur Magazine
Radio Host: Syndicated Kick Start Guy Segment




" We all face obstacles in our lives and careers. Some of these come from within, subverting our conscious intentions. The  good news is: they can be overcome.  The techniques and processes found in this book will help you on your way."

-Margaret Heffernan – Author: The Naked Truth: A Working Woman's

 Manifesto on Business and What Really Matters

Syndicated Columnist: Fast Company Magazine




“A scientifically-based, spiritually-awake, (and smart and funny) guide to making the most of your life.  Ian Blei provides the know-how, the inspiration, the structure and all the tools you need in  this straightforward and inspirational book.”

     -Lisa Betts-LaCroix, Past President of SF Coaches
Star of Unapix film, “Dance Me Outside”




" Ian Blei shares his deep insights in simple and straightforward ways.  His work continues to inspire me whenever I feel I'm getting stuck in some area of my life."

-Roy King, III , Senior Partner/Channel Marketing Manager - Skype





© 2001- 2016 Optimized Results. All Rights Reserved     205 Chattanooga St.   San Francisco, CA 94114     415.826.0478